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ALTAndrew Robinson about his first scene on Deep Space Nine
"i'm not triggered or upset by or even ideologically opposed to it, i just associate it with something so bad that i can't enjoy it anymore" is such a frustrating relationship to have with a piece of media
it’s covered in the fucking ooze!!
i said this in the comments but i'm reblogging to say too: babes i think what some of you in the tags are experiencing is actually being triggered 😭
this is about the joy just kind of being sucked out of something. if you can't engage with a piece of media at all to the point you have to blacklist it because seeing it does psychic damage, that's a trigger even if it doesn't make you full-blown panic!
1.) pinning this version on my blog in the hopes that at least one visitor rethinks how their trauma has affected them. some of the stuff being described in my activity feed is pretty intense. this is about like... an album being your first breakup album or someone was Too Annoying about trying to get you into it, not something your abuser forced you to play with them.
2.) this is not about harry potter, that shit is ideologically rancid even without JKR digging holes
3.) sorry about whatever the hell happened with gorillaz and jojo for a surprising many of you
…and he is definitely what you get after deciding to “just roll with it” on a warlock in WoW in terms of just absorbing any in character interaction no matter how completely off the wall it might be as a challenge to my own ability to do creative writing. Over the years, Calleo has absorbed a LOT of things and I’ve retconned next to nothing.
It turns out what you get is an old Blood Elf Warlock who carries a broom, wears socks with sandals (keeps Orgrimmar sand out of the toes), and will 100% follow an entire Orc around the city (gotta make sure he was hearing it correctly, after all) whose profile details having an authentic Pit Lord Jaw axe that you can absolutely hear if you get close enough and just go with, “Have you tried just telling it to, like, shut up for five seconds?”
And it spiraled into a long and entertaining conversation with Calleo detailing to this guy about how it sometimes works because it catches them off guard, they don’t expect any backtalk or anything but fear or anger or whatever and it came wrapped in, “I’ve got something like three imps, four felhounds, one ball of void energy in anger form, and sometimes a felguard or a very angry eye talking constantly and they never do actually shut up but it gets easier to turn them into background head noise if you just pretend they’re sort of irritating but not much more than a minor inconvenience and after awhile that’s just sort of what it becomes anyway” and “Try using it to chop firewood or vegetables or to clean your fingernails with, it’ll love that.”
At one point the Orc’s axe was literally vibrating with anger and Calleo just shook his stupid fucking broom, that’s usually used to swat an imp down from somewhere, in response and that only made it angrier.
“Should put it next to the dried up old heart I got from one of those things years ago and see if they know each other.” - I AM AN ENTIRELY SERIOUS ROLEPLAYER, I promise, that particular warlock just snapped in a weird way.
Which inadvertently gave the player a whole arc of what they could do with the concept that they hadn’t even considered and that’s great to hear largely because I so rarely do public RP with people I don’t already know these days and I haven’t done anything with Calleo in years.
But, c'mon, tell me you wouldn’t at least be curious if this just walked up and asked you if you’d tried telling your cursed weapon to just stop talking.
He was free. He used to be a working ratter on a farm (no surprise as he’s a mini rat terrier), lived with two larger male dogs, and they didn’t really want to get rid of him.
However:
Anyway, he’s about 10lb, and is a super neat dog! Even when he’s nervous about something new he’s still somehow super confident and cheerful about it. If he had his way I’d probably be carrying him everywhere.
us'cut is over the moon but, as it’s been a few days now, he’s much better at not losing his shit entirely and freaking Lil Dude out by being an 85lb beast who wants to literally do nothing but groom him forever (this is what happens when a dog grows up with a bunch of cats that groom each other to show affection :D ).
He also will walk on his hind legs if he wants to see more, and absolutely loves it if I pick him up and hold him over my head so he can see over the fence.
He is the friendliest dog, which is apparently a breed trait of rat terriers. The only thing I dislike so far, and that will probably fade as he settles in, is that if he’s on my lap he is always, like if I’m not actively blocking him, trying to lick my mouth and nose. I know that’s a normal dog greeting behavior but I do not want a dog tongue on my lips or nose it’s just ick, so we’re working on other things he can do to affectionately greet (like just bump me with his nose, or lick my hand, have me scratch his ears/head/back, etc…) and it’s also one reason he hasn’t been allowed to sleep on the bed yet.
First reason is us'cut would just cry all night; both dogs out or no dogs out. Second reason is I did actually try to lay down with him a few times hoping he’d settle down and curl up either under blankets or on them but no, 10 solid minutes of having my face licked no matter how I tried to hide it and if he couldn’t get to it he started crying. That is, again, probably just more nervous behavior as he’s had his whole life uprooted but it’s also kinda gross. :)
Cats don’t mind him, and when Himbo tried the usual ‘bully the dog’ thing he learned that you can hit a big herding dog and it’ll probably go “Oh, sorry…” but if you square up with a terrier, it doesn’t matter if the terrier is 5lb smaller than you, because the terrier does not acknowledge that fact. Himbo got the surprise of his life by being snarled at (as dogs don’t hiss) and got hit right back and right in the face the same way he hit Lil Dude.
Himbo was beyond pissed off but he has not bothered Lil Dude again and the last time he approached, it was a much friendlier approach.
maidens if you are going to flee dramatically from my castle in the middle of the night once i reveal my true nature to you please leave your candelabra on the little ledge by the portcullis we are running out of them
starting to think these maidens are stumbling in soaked through from the rain just to steal my beautiful gowns and homeware are any of you actually lost
MØUSE マウス (2003)
what a wonderful young lady, i sure hope her breasts don’t swap positions with each other or something
Noir series continues with a game of pool at Vic's.
Please notice that Mr. Garak is the first one of... six?
Pool Series: 1/6
B\w (true noir) version under cut
I graduated high school in 99.
There was a student at our school named Wayne.
Wayne was gay. It was obvious. He was unable to stay in the closet even if he wanted to. To make matters worse, he was also Black. From a bullying standpoint, that was not a great combo. Both Black and white students made fun of him relentlessly. He was ostracized from the only community that may have given him protection. Only us theater kids stuck up for him, but not to significant effect.
Wayne was bullied so much that at one point he finally snapped and attacked his bullies with a lunch tray. I was actually seated in perfect line of sight and just sat there chewing my soggy fries in stunned silence. It didn't even seem real as I was witnessing it. The image of him wailing on his main bully as the food on his tray flew off is permanently logged into my long term memory.
The bully he attacked had blood all over his face and went straight to the nurse. Other than superficial cuts, he was not injured.
Before the attack, Wayne went to teachers for help.
He went to guidance counselors for help.
He went to the principals for help.
He did all of the things you were supposed to do. No one helped him. They wagged a finger at the bullies and warned them to stop.
Wayne's lunch tray melee was the only thing that worked. His bullies stayed far away from him. But a week later Wayne was expelled and the bullies were given no punishment.
So... no.
No one in my school talked about being trans.
Because the only way to survive being openly queer was to bash people with a lunch tray.
Okay first.
Damn.
Second:
We may not have talked about being trans in high school, but everyone I hung out with in college came out as trans within the past three years.
Why yes!
In elementary school, there was K, who only played with the boys, and only wore shorts or athletic pants, and who I found weeping in the bathroom in 4th grade because it was picture day and her mother insisted she wear this very girly outfit and she was bawling that it was all wrong because she "was a tomboy not a girl". It was 1992 that was the closest word the kid knew.
And in high school, I knew a kid who shared at lunch one day that they knew they weren't a boy but they didn't think they were a girl either and it was confusing and distressing. And all of us at the lunch table just sort of patted their shoulder or knee awkwardly and a couple people quietly said it was okay to not know, or that they would figure it out. And then we changed the subject. It was 1998, I think. We were very quiet about the whole thing cuz that kind of talk could get your ass kicked.
And my boyfriend at about the same time would not come out as gender fluid for many years, but he was already wearing dresses when his band performed and getting his ass kicked by his dad for wearing nail polish, and asking me odd very vulnerable questions about being a girl.
Just because we didn't have language for it in that time and place and at those ages doesn't mean kids weren't talking about it, or weren't having those experiences.
I graduated in 1996.
I didn't learn the word transgender until I was in my 20's.
But every moment of telling my parents when I was barely old enough to remember it how parts of me felt like they didn't belong; the girlfriends that dumped me because "it feels like I'm dating another girl" and how it stung so hard I made my first subconscious attempt towards suicide; every fucking stupid intrusive thought involving a pair of scissors. All of that suddenly fucking CLICKED. They kept it from us. lies of omission, a world not connected enough for us to learn it on our own, and ALL the everything telling you to hide it to survive. It still took me the better part of two decades to break down the indoctrination, denial, internalized shame, and everything else to finally come out.
And I look at how few trans people there are from my generation- I go back through my yearbooks and wonder how many others there were, only I'm having to guess at how many went stealth and disappeared, how many might still be locked up in denial, and how many simply didn't survive long enough to get it.
Gen X was hopefully the last generation to have this be this widespread. I look at all the trans kids younger than me coming out and realizing who they are, and I am so fucking glad they were able to learn and get to it sooner than I did.
i was born in 1961. i remember being about seven and telling my mother that i thought i was supposed to be a boy. i got the very passive christian “oh no you’re wrong, god doesn’t make mistakes” speech. i was always a tomboy as a kid. i tried to be feminine but it never felt right. i’m a 62 year old nonbinary person. we exist. i have trans friends in their 70s and older. we exist. do not erase us. we exist.
I'm a bit outside that time frame - I graduated in '08 - but I have very clear memories of being an afab 12-year-old and excitedly signing up for a fashion show at the county fair... and doing very poorly because the outfit I had lovingly put together was very masc and I could not carry myself the way that the other girls did on the runway. I have very clear memories of being fifteen and going through a puberty I did not want, and reading in a 9th grade health textbook that "poor body image" and dressing to hide your figure was a warning sign of serious mental health issues in teenage girls and resolving to never say anything about how much I hated my chest and my hips because I didn't want anyone to think I was going to take all the drugs and then kill myself.
Graduated high school in ‘98 and had been telling people from the time I could talk that I was “a boy and a girl” and would switch which one based on how I was feeling; as I got older, the term that was used and that I still use was “genderqueer” (that’s since shifted, at least with younger generations to non-binary, in most cases, I still prefer the term genderqueer).
I also had several friends who talked, with safe people, about being trans, gay, bi, pan, or otherwise queer.
In my case, I was never wrong, as I found out decades later through a series of medical weirdness that I am, in fact, intersex and very literally a bit of both.
My grandma, in the 40s, had several friends in nursing who talked about it as well; one of the stories she used to recount was one woman in their friend group swearing she “could always tell” when literally two people in said friend group of allegedly all women were a lesbian couple and one she just thought was a “tomboy” (spoiler: He was trans).
What was Heather’s point again?
Like its namesake, this board is also an unstable failure.
Got this tweet recommended to me a moment ago.
In addition to being a shit thing to do to strikers and the public in general, it’s also extremely damaging to the trees to prune them back that severely during the summer.
Not only could it kill the trees, but it can also discourage regrowth for several years because that level of pruning during active growing season is legitimately traumatic to the trees.
So, really, whoever did it, is a jackass on multiple levels.
I wish wizards were real so bad imagine coming out of a wal mart and seeing some guy with long robes and a big hat in the parking lot surrounded by wacky particle effects screaming some shit like "By the moon and the starlight, by the shield and the sword, I summon to me, my Honda Accord!" And then just getting into his car and driving off
